Tuesday April 6th - 10 days to go.

It's been a while since I've written a BC update, so I thought I'd better get one out this week. Thank you all so much for all your e-mails and Facebook messages of love and support these past weeks. Every one of them is special and means the world to me.

I've been so busy getting ready for the LAPD dance event this weekend, which has turned out to be the best therapy for me. I purposely scheduled my surgery for after the event; and while I was a bit nervous waiting so long, I'm very glad I did. The more I read and talk to doctors, the more I'm convinced there was no reason to rush, as my type of cancer is slow growing.

Talk about building character! Fear of the unknown is one challenge I will be able to check off my "bucket list" as having overcome! As much as I've read, researched, and discussed with survivors, it's still all "theory" to me until April 16th, and every experience is unique. I've done my homework, made all my decisions, set the stage for recovery and beyond, and now I'm ready!

I'm a little concerned right now because Melanie has the flu. Not just the fact that my baby is feeling pretty awful, with a 103 degree temperature and very sore throat, possibly strep (life just isn't right when any of my kids are sick). But also because if I get sick I can't have surgery. Can we please borrow every one of your immune systems? We promise to return them promptly!

So, if all is well, on April 16, 2010, at 1:00pm at Torrance Memorial Hospital, I will undergo a bilateral mastectomy with immediate tissue expander implant reconstruction. I have chosen this route not only because it was recommended by my doctor, but because it is ultimately the best decision for me. The cancer is in two different areas in my right breast; and the two papillomas in my left breast have a good chance of developing into cancer in the future. I've never been particularly breast-identified, but a body part is a body part, and my goal has always been to retain as many of mine as possible. If I'd chosen lumpectomies, I would also have to have radiation. Being diabetic, I want this surgery behind me for good. This disease runs in my family. I want to do whatever I can now to reduce the chances of this coming back EVER.

So I spend my days now reading, stoning costumes, visiting doctors, working with my pro-am students who are competing at LAPD this weekend, going to support group meetings, practicing my competition routines with Don & Larry, cooking, working out at the gym, getting the house ready, filling prescriptions, being wife & mom, and connecting with friends. I have little time to get scared or nervous... except in my quite moments, which, believe it or not, do exist. But I allow myself to have those moments, cry a little if necessary, dry my tears, and get on with life.

What remains to be seen is how I do after the fact! I've already gained 10 pounds from stress-eating, and will probably gain more from inactivity during recovery, but I'm okay with that. A friend suggested getting a prescription for anti-anxiety meds for the day(s) just prior to surgery should I start to feel anxious, so I did. I'm hoping I won't need them, but just in case, it's good knowing they're there.

I have also been blessed with the news that my wonderful sister Beverly from Israel is coming to visit!! I haven't seen her in over 3 years since my mother's funeral, and she is coming on the 18th to be with me for my recovery. She is staying 10 days. I couldn't be more grateful!

I want to express my love and appreciation for all of you reading this who are seeing me through this new chapter in my life. Please don't hesitate to ask me any questions at all if you are curious about something, anything. You'd be doing me a favor because I seem to need to talk about this, alot. I will update again next week before my big day, and then again afterwards as soon as I'm up to it.

I'd like to finish by sharing with you an e-mail I was sent an e-mail this week that really hit home. It was a story about a family who’d just lost their dog, and were wondering aloud about the sad fact that animal lives are shorter than human lives. Their six-year-old boy, who had been listening quietly, piped up and said, ''I know why.''

He said,''People are born so that they can learn how to live a good life -- like loving everybody all the time and being nice, right?''

The Six-year-old continued,''Well, dogs already know how to do that, so they don't have to stay as long.''

In this time of crisis and soul-searching, I look to my dog Bob for guidance.

If Bob could talk, this is what he'd tell me to do:

When a loved one comes home, always run to greet them.

Never pass up the chance to go for a joyride.

Allow the experience of fresh air and the wind in your face to be pure ecstasy.

Take many naps.

Stretch before rising.

Run, romp, and play daily.

Avoid biting when a simple growl will do.

On warm days, stop to lie on your back on the grass.

On hot days, drink lots of water and lie under a shady tree.

When you're happy, dance around and wag your entire body.

Delight in the simple joy of a long walk.

Be loyal.

Never pretend to be something you're not.

If what you want lies buried, dig until you find it.

When someone is having a bad day, be silent, sit close by, and nuzzle them gently.

ENJOY EVERY MOMENT OF EVERY DAY!

Much love,
Rhonda